Why do I call some of you my "friends"? All you do is sit around and tell me how much you hate me. You tell me that I'm worthless, annoying, and stupid. Your main pastime seems to be bringing me down. Well, I don't want to be your 'Fucking Brian' anymore! Do you not see that I have feelings too? Do you not see that I DO care about what you say? Do you not realize how much your supposed "friendship" means to me? Maybe I am stupid; stupid for thinking you could ever be my friend. You kick me when I'm down, you laugh at me behind my back. And yet, I am still at your mercy. I call you my friend, I get scared thinking that I could lose that. Am I stupid to think that I could ever change that? Am I stupid to think that things could actually go back to the way they were between us? Love: a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. To say that I love you would not be a lie. I am, however, not in love with you. To say that I would not miss your "friendship" would be a lie. As things are now, it's tearing me apart. To lose what little we do have would leave me an empty shell. I am no longer close to those I call friends; I have recluse of sorts, seperated from the rest of society by an ever expanding black hole. It would be an understatement to say I want to feel loved. I need to feel loved, for the sake of my very survival. I am surrounded by those that call me friend, and most treat me with the respect that I deserve. They enjoy my company, they are the ones that I turn to when I have fell. But even with all of these people surrounding me, I still feel so alone. You know who you are, even though you won't be reading this. Do you ever think about the things you say to me? Do you ever contemplate the fact that I too am a human being, and that I have real feelings? Sometimes I hope that you do, that you'll realize the error of your ways and things will go back to the way they were before. We came so close once, but we let the past get in the way of progress. I hope this shall not always be the case. How does it feel to treat me like you do
When you've laid your hands upon me
And told me who you are
I thought I was mistaken
I thought I heard your words
Tell me
How do I feel tell me now
How do I feel
How does it feel?
How should I feel?
Tell me how does it feel?
To treat me like you do
Those who came before me
Lived through their vocations
From the past until completion
They'll turn away no more
And I still find it so hard
To say what I need to say
But I'm quite sure that you'll tell me
Just how I should feel today
I see ship in the harbor
I can and shall obey
But if it wasn't for your misfortunes
I'd be a heavenly person today
And I thought I was mistaken
And I thought I heard you speak
Tell me how do I feel
Tell me now
How should I feel
Now I stand here waiting
I thought I told you to leave me
While I walked down to the beach
Tell me how does it feel when your heart grows cold
How does it feel?
How should I feel?
Tell me how does it feel?
To treat me like you do ~Blue Monday, Orgy Labels: Soapbox, Terrene Details |
